Professor Severus Snape's Bad, Bad Day
by Jasmine Slytherin
Summary: It's the easter holidays and Snape wants to get some peace and quiet. But the Gryffindors will do anything to disturb the peace and quiet...
1. Peace and Quiet

At last, the Easter holidays, a time for Snape to at last enjoy himself. For while everybody was outside and enjoying the sun, Severus Snape sat in his office, with his feet up on a stool.  
  
Finally he had managed to get away from Neville, who melted every cauldron he got near. He had got away from Fred and George who set of fireworks every time Snape's back was turned. And, he had managed to get away from that pesky Potter and co. who. well. were. Gryffindors. At least, so he thought.  
  
For as Snape enjoyed his last minutes of peace and solitude, Fred and George were in the Gryffindor common room. As Neville staggered through the portrait hole, he saw them sitting near the fireplace.  
  
"Hello Neville," George said. He quickly stuffed something in a small bag.  
  
"What are you doing inside on a day like this?" Fred grinned mischeviously.  
  
"I've lost my toad!" Neville wailed.  
  
"Oh well, too bad."  
  
"We haven't seen him, of course."  
  
Neville staggered out again, leaving Fred and George alone in the common room.  
  
A few moments later, Fred and George were outside Snape's office door.  
  
"Okay," said Fred. "Remember."  
  
"Yes, I know."  
  
Fred his round the corner, while George made his first move. He ran down the corridor outside, as noisily as he could, and set off four fireworks, which bounced noisily and violently around outside Snape's office. That definitely attracted Snape's attention. He ran out and started to chase after George. Fred then slipped into his office, opened the drawer, put the bag in, the set off five more fireworks, which bounced everywhere, knocking things as they bounced loudly and violently around the room. 


	2. April Fool's Hero

Fred ran out, and Snape spotted him. Snape gave up trying to chase them. It was only ten to ten in the morning, and he was already having to wipe the sweat off his forehead. He decided to go to see Minerva McGonnagal, the head of the Weasly twins' house.  
  
"I'll talk to you in a minute, Severus, if you can just fetch me a long stand from the supply closet," McGonnagal said.  
  
So off Snape went to the supply closet, and stood there for ages trying to find a long stand for McGonnagal. At 11 o' clock, he gave up and stormed back to her office.  
  
"Well, where's the long stand?" he asked furiously, looking as if he might explode any minute.  
  
"You've just had it!" replied McGonnagal cheerily. "April fools!"  
  
Snape stormed out of the room, and he was just walking down the corridor when he turned the corner and saw a. HOODED FIGURE!  
  
He ran around in circles yelling  
  
"A hooded figure! A hooded figure!"  
  
over and over again, until crowds gathered around him.  
  
"Severus, calm down," said Dumbledore. "Look it's only a Bertie Botts Every Flavour Bean!" He pointed at it, and indeed it was.  
  
"But - I-"  
  
"Vomit flavour, I believe."  
  
Snape stood staring at the bean on the floor until Professor Lupin came along. The bean changed into a big silver ball.  
  
"Remus, what are you - "  
  
"It's a boggart! Now I know that you're afraid of hooded figures! April fools!"  
  
Cursing, Snape stormed off back down the corridor, more than he had stormed off before. He had nearly reached his office when Fred and George ran out of it, carrying a toad.  
  
"Come back here!" Snape started to chase after them.  
  
"Accio - Cleansweep Sevens!"  
  
Two broomsticks came whizzing up to Fred and George, knocking Snape on the head violently as the came. They flew up into the air on them, and they dangled the toad in the air, accidentally dropping it.  
  
Snape ran, and caught it.  
  
"Now I can confiscate - "  
  
"Professor Snape saved my toad!" Neville ran out from behind a nearby bush.  
  
Then Colin Creevy came, and started taking pictures. "You're a hero, Professor Snape!"  
  
Snape growled, looking too menacing to be a hero, but big crowds gathered round, once again. Snape seemed to be getting a lot of attention that day.  
  
"Take your toad, and go!" Snape thrust the toad at Neville.  
  
He then pushed McGonnagal and Colin Creevy to one side to get out. Colin was still taking pictures so he got a bit of himself and McGonnagal on aswell as Snape himself.  
  
He stormed off yet again. He stormed all around the castle, telling people off for "eating" and "breathing" and "walking heavily", then he stormed into his office and locked the door. He fell asleep in his chair. 


	3. A Hairy Mess

When he woke up, it was the next morning. He went into the Great Hall, as usual, for breakfast.  
  
He couldn't understand why people were giggling and pointing at him, and why Albus and Minerva kept having to cough loudly, obviously covering a loud outburst of laughter.  
  
When Colin Creevy started taking pictures, he stormed out of the Great Hall (he never walks) and went and looked in his office mirror. and guess what he saw.  
  
While he was asleep, Fred and George had picked the lock, came in, and dyed his hair and all of his clothes a very bright, fluorescent pink color!  
  
So Snape decided that he would have to go to Muggle London to get a hair dye to dye his hair back to the way it was.  
  
When at last he got to London, he did not know where to look. He would have gone into Diagon Alley to look for a hair dye, but some people knew his there and he did not want them to see him like that.  
  
So while he was storming through the streets of London, he came to a long line of people, queuing out of a shop, going from one side of the street to another.  
  
He pushed two people in the middle of the line apart, so he could get through. They knocked into one another like a set of dominoes and a policeman saw him.  
  
"Get the murderer in pink!" (Not the men in black!!)  
  
Everybody started to chase after him, and he did a kind of storming-and- running-to-save-your-life action to get away.  
  
While he was running he saw somebody who works in Hogsmeade who he knew. At the sight of him she screamed and ran away.  
  
Snape managed to get away from everybody by casting a quick spell of invisibility on himself (well away from the muggles).  
  
He reappeared outside of a clothes shop. He went in and with the last of his muggle money he had, bought a big black coat with a hood. When he put it on, nobody could see even a spot of pink.  
  
He had to change some galleons for muggle money in the Leaky Cauldron, as he was running low. He stormed into the Leaky Cauldron.  
  
Tom was at the bar, serving out drinks to Dedalus Diggle and his friends.  
  
"I want to change this." He thrust a handful of galleons at him.  
  
"Why are you wearing a big heavy coat on a day like this?"  
  
"None of your business." He snatched the $50 note from Tom and started to storm out of the Leaky Cauldron, when his hood fell down.  
  
Everybody burst into laughter or mad fits of giggles. Snape put up the hood and stormed even more.  
  
AT LAST he found a black hair dye and all he needed to do then was figure out how to use it.  
  
He then stormed all the way back to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. 


	4. Using the Dye, and The Photos

Now Snape had the dye, he had to figure out how to use it. It said to use things like a "hairdryer". He went to question Dumbledore about it.  
  
While Snape was away, Fred and George slipped into his office once again. They took out the bottle of Snape's black hair dye, and then they took the bottle of pink hair dye out from their pockets.  
  
"This," said Fred, "will be hilarious."  
  
-----------------  
  
Snape stormed back into his office, and after hours at last managed to figure out how to use it. He couldn't see well because it was dark, but he could see bits of his shiny black hair glinting in the mirror.  
  
He went to go to his bed but instead he just fell asleep in the chair.  
  
-----------------  
  
In the morning he woke up. He didn't bother to look in the mirror, but instead rushed into the Great Hall.  
  
As soon as he stormed into the Great Hall, he stormed straight out again, as Colin Creevy had started taking pictures and people were staring at him in disbelief.  
  
As he was storming back to his office, McGonnagal stepped out from her office, which was right next to his.  
  
"I see you've started a trend, Severus," she said. "One hair style each day!"  
  
"Shut up." Snape pushed her out of the way and stormed into his office.  
  
When he looked in his mirror. guess what he saw.  
  
His hair was black AND pink! He groaned, and looked at the black hair dye. It was all gone, and he couldn't risk going back into London to get another dye. so he decided to wait until the dye came off.  
  
But he didn't realise that it was a permanent dye.  
  
------------------------  
  
Later on in the day, he overheard Colin Creevy talking to some other Gryfinndors and a few Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws.  
  
"I got 100!" he was saying. "The camera got a bit overloaded though, and it exploded, but the film survived! And I brewed it in the right potion so that they move!"  
  
He was shuffling through something, when the others burst into laughter.  
  
"He doesn't want to go into the picture!" somebody was saying.  
  
"Look, there he is!"  
  
All of them turned round.  
  
"Will you sign of these for me?"  
  
Reluctantly, Snape scribble his initials on the bottom of each of the 100 photos.  
  
"Snape's giving out signed photos!" yelled a Hufflepuff boy.  
  
Suddenly, Lockhart came down the corridor.  
  
"We'll make it a double photo, and both sign it, how about that?"  
  
Colin Creevy started taking millions of photos, and after the camera had exploded, Snape managed to get way. Unfortunately, though, he met Lockhart again.  
  
"I had to come along and save you there, you'd look a tad bighead if I wasn't there with you. I know, being a Potions master isn't as good as winning Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile award five times in a row, but it's a start." 


End file.
